A Serious Man

A Serious Man is seriously dark, seriously surreal, seriously twisted. The Coen Brothers film it reminds me most of is Barton Fink. Certainly, Larry Gropnick, protagonist of A Serious Man shares similar obstacles as Barton Fink. But whereas Fink suffered a severe case of writer's block, Gropnick is blocked by the stagnation and stultification of suburbia.

Gropnick is living the so-called American dream: married, two kids, up for tenure. But his wife announces she wants a divorce, his brother is a permanent fixture on the living room couch, and his tenure is being sabotaged by anonymous letter writer as well as a disgruntled student who simultaneously attempts to bribe and blackmail Gropnick into giving him a passing grade.

The stuck between a rock and hard place situation that Gropnick finds himself in with his student pretty much defines his life. Like a fly caught in spider web, Gropnick finds himself struggling unsuccessfully against an seemingly unceasing series of setbacks. Billed as a "comedy," the humor in A Serious Man is exceeding dark and painful. We laugh--but mainly it's a sense of relief that no matter how bad our own lives are, our troubles pale in comparison to the misfortunes of that poor putz, Gropnick, who desperately needs Anton Chigurh to put him out of his misery...

A Serious Man has its moments. Most of the cast, including Michael Stuhlbarg as the entirely luckless Larry, are fairly unknown. You might recognize a few characters: Richard Kind (Spin City, Mad about You) as Larry's even unluckier brother Arthur, Simon Helberg (Big Bang Theory) as Rabbi Scott, Goerge Wyner (too many credits to mention) as Rabbi Nachtner and Adam Arkin as the divorce lawyer. My favorite character was dry and deadpan Mrs. Samsky: Larry's nude-sunbathing, pot-smoking next door neighbor played exquisitely by Amy Landecker.

Although this is far from my favorite Coen Brothers flick, it is definitely classic Coen Brothers in its sensibilities. The story is book-ended between a Yiddish fable and an ambiguous ending that leaves both its Job-like protagonist and audience to grapple with the messy and unfinished business that is life. As Larry's student's father says to him, "Please accept the mystery." And perhaps that is what the Coen brothers are saying to us with this film about life.

Please accept the mystery. You may not understand the beginning. Or the ending. Or anything that comes between. But that's okay.

It's life. It is what it is.

Dear Whore of Lucifer

My latest favorite best of Craigslist post comes via Chicago:

I have recently enrolled in a 12-step program for people whose lives were decimated and finances ruined by lawyer bills when their spouses filed for divorce after finding someone else to fuck and run off with. I am currently up to Step 8: Willingness to Make Amends. As such, I apologize for the following recent transgressions:

Told the drunk at the bar who wanted a Red-Headed Slut that he's more than welcome to you if that general contractor douchebag is done with you.

Annoyed the staff at several hospitals by calling to see if they had any fresh organ donors on hand with a heart suitable to replace your cold, dead one.

Demanded a refund from Southwest Airlines because I tried to get you on one of their planes but they refused to let my bag fly free as advertised in their TV commercials.

Scrawled your cell number in the stall of the john of the bar at the American Legion post down the street with an offer of free prostate exams for all veterans 65 and older.

Told my neighborhood U.S. Marine Corps recruiter that I knew the exact location of the dank, hopeless cave Osama Bin Laden was hiding in and provided the GPS coordinates to your pants.

Lit several offering candles at your church with prayers that karma would hurry its ass up and come around to you while I was still alive to see it.

For these things, my dear handmaiden of Satan, I make my amends. I'd still love to see your head squeezed in a vice until your eyeballs squirt out of their sockets, but I have to go along with the program.

Nip/Tuck on DVD 10/6

One of the benefits of finally getting cable was experimenting with a wide variety of programming. One of those experiments was Nip/Tuck, an FX series about two plastic surgeons and the exaltation of image and superficiality and misogyny. The surgery scenes are grotesquely graphic, the sex scenes seem to be written by pimply male virgins whose only exposure to sex comes from downloaded internet porn.

But at the same time, the series is perversely addictive. It's hard to believe this sexist, cynical piece of work comes from the creator of Glee, Ryan Murphy. Nip/Tuck Season 5, part 2 came out on DVD on October 6th, documenting the continuing misadventures of Drs. McNamara (Dylan Walsh) and Troy (Julian McMahon). The DVD contains eight episodes of the second half of season five as well as a fascinating featurette called "The Science of Beauty."

My favorite part of season 5, part 2 was the guest appearance of Richard Burgi (aka Karl Mayer of Desperate Housewives) as Christian's replacement, Dr. Logan Taper. Taper has a fetish that compels him to fornicate with furniture and strangely enough--although the Drs. McNamara and Troy consistently objectify their sexual partners--Christian and Sean are completely freaked out by Dr. Taper's behavior.

Season 6 of Nip/Tuck began last week and as disgusting as the scalpel and sexual escapes of McNamara and Troy are, it's like a train wreck you just can't look away from.

Zombieland

Zombieland was a much better vehicle for the charms of Jesse Eisenberg than Adventureland. Both films featured Eisenberg's geeky character pining for an unattainable female and amusement parks. But Zombieland has Woody Harrelson and zombies. Lots of zombies.

Inspired by Shaun of the Dead, Zombieland features the same cartoonish violence laced with dark humor. I'm no fan of horror flicks and even Zombieland had moments that made me squirm and flinch, but overall the movie was a fun ride.

Harrelson's Tallahassee is part Woody Boyd, part Mickey Knox--unrelenting badass zombie killer. Paired up with Eisenberg's anxiety-ridden Columbus (aka "Ohio"), Zombieland starts out as an unusual buddy film. The odd couple eventually meet up with sisters Little Rock (Abigail Breslin) and Wichita (Emma Stone) along the way and become a sort of dysfunctional family unit.

Yeah, it's pretty predictable plot-wise and our heroes always pretty conveniently manage to finding a working vehicle and plenty of ammunition, but if you're in the mood for a zombie killing spree (and who ISN'T?) this is the movie for you.

The Invention of Lying

With the votes split between Ricky Gervais and zombies, I choose the movie the started later. Yeah, that's how I make important entertainment decision. Given that I've been feeling more than a little zombie-like lately, the extra 45 minutes between showing times tipped the scales in Gervais favor.

Although one of my fellow movie-going patrons snickered hysterically throughout, I didn't find the film all that amusing. The premise of a world that is always painfully honest was interesting--albeit stretched thin over 100 minutes. Gervais plays sad sack Mark Bellison who discovers--or "invents"--lying. In a world of blind people, the one-eye man is king and this is Bellison's fate as the inventor and only person able to lie.

The only way the filmmakers could elicit humor was not only to create a universe where people didn't/couldn't lie, but also are incessantly forthcoming with their views--also with Tourette's style zeal.

I didn't find the so-called honest revelations all that humorous, but the film does raise some intriguing issues--for example how does advertising (which is basically lying..) work in a world that can't lie. The most provocative topic the film touches on is the "mythology" of religion. I wish it had been explored in more depth, but given that the movie was supposed to be a comedy--and a romantic comedy at that, that subject was merely glossed over.

The movie didn't even examine truth/lying in regard to relationships--which is unfortunates because it could have generated a lot of mileage on that subject. Gervais is unlikely romantic lead, but he somehow manages to pull it off. First in Ghost Town with Tea Leoni and now with Jennifer Garner. His awkwardness is made somehow endearing and truthfully (no pun intended) the best parts of the movie wasn't the lame humor but the few honest and poignant moments .

I don't recommend The Invention of Lying. Perhaps as a Netflix selection--but if you are jonesing for some good Ricky Gervais, rent Ghost Town instead...

Decisions, decisions...

October is National Breast Cancer Month - Sip for the Cure

It's National Breast Cancer Awareness Month which means you'll be seeing a lot of "pink" products out there. One that I recently had a chance to test out was Republic of Tea Pomegranate Vanilla tea. The red tea (Rooibos) combines tangy pomegranate with luscious vanilla bean. It smells awesome and tastes great, too!

Pomegranate Vanilla is part of Republic of Tea Sip for the Cure collection which includes a Pink Grapefruit Green Tea, Pink Lady Apple Green Tea and Pink Lemonade Green Tea (see what I mean about the "pink"?). A portion of the sales get donated to the Susan G. Komen Foundation--so you've got an anti-oxidant rich red tea that's good for you and for a good cause.

Y'all can commemorate National Breast Cancer Awareness month by running for the cure or walking for the cure. Me, I'll just kick back with Republic of Tea Pomegranate Vanilla and sip for the cure...

Ahhhh!

Heroes - Ink

Speaking of great lines, Sylar has become quite funny trapped inside Matt Parkman's head.

"I wish I was a ghost. It would be so much better than this hell...being stuck in your miserable life. I mean, have you seen yourself eat a burrito?"

"I will be happy to leave you stewing in your mediocrity."

"Not as easy to ignore me as you thought. It's because I ooze charm..."

In response to Matt saying, "You're ignoring me now?" "It doesn't feel very good, does it?"

The new heroes are way less annoying than last season's rejects. The only new character I find irritating is Claire's new roomie, Gretchen played by Madeline Zima. Zima is also on Californication. I find her to be annoying on that show as well...

Another plus in the lack of annoyances department is the absence of Mohinder Suresh. Not even his mellifluous voiceover to disrupt the show. Unfortunately it looks like he's returning next week...

Koothrapalli Strikes Again

Maybe the writers give him all the best lines because much of the time he suffers from selective mutism around women.



"That's because in your dreams you're a horse from the waist down..."

Best line of the night...

Desperate Housewives - Nice is Different than Good

Show of hands--who was surprised that it was Susan up at the altar with Mike and not Katherine?

Yeah, me neither.

Susan's happiness came at the expense of Katherine--and it looks like there will be hell to pay the rest of the season. Hey, Susan! Think Edie was a bitch? You ain't seen nothing yet!

Gaby had a nice moment with rebellious wild child niece Ana. Lynette is suffering from pre-partum depression. And Bree and Karl are hooking up.

New neighbors Drea De Matteo along with hubby and surly son (How'd they manage to get themselves invited to Mike and Susan's wedding when they'd only lived on Wisteria Lane for less than three months?) have some sort of secret. Looks like young Danny is a psychopath than will make Julie and Susan Mayer regard creepy Zach Young in a more positive light.

Did y'all catch Max Carver aka Preston Scavo as one of the interns on the season opener of The Office? I wonder if this means more guest spots on other shows...After all, Lynette did say that Preston was moving to Europe. "We will never be done if we birth TWO every time ONE moves out...That's just math!"

Dexter - Living the Dream

It's finally arrived. The reason I got cable. The reason I subscribed to Showtime. Season four of Dexter. I've long doubted that the show could sustain its amazing edge-of-your-seat thrills, but each season it not only maintains but surpasses.

I believe season four won't be any different. A sleep-deprived new daddy Dexter has already set himself up to be found out for the serial killer that he is when he crashes his car before disposing of the body. In addition, Special Agent Lundy is back on the heels of another serial killer dubbed the "Trinity Killer" (John Lithgow--creepiness incarnate...) and Miami homicide is dealing with tourists being snuffed.

Welcome to Miami--not the best boost for tourism....

Loved Dexter musing about how he needs to be extra careful with his killings now that he's a Dad. "I'm killing for two now..."

Loved the pairing of Batista and Laguerta. Those two deserve to be happy.

Wonder what Lundy's return means for Deb's relationship with Anton...

And let's not forget Deb's search for the Confidential Informant with whom Harry had an affair. Once she finds out it was Laura Moser, Dexter's mom--as well as the details of how Harry found Dexter...

It's shaping up to be one heck of a season!

Facebook Thinks I'm Gay

...not that there's anything wrong with that!

Monica Hesse over at the Washington Post chatted online about a new Facebook app dubbed "Project Gaydar." According to Hesse, "it can determine users sexual orientation based on their Facebook associations."

Hmm...I'm not sure about that--but based on the ads Facebook serves up for me, it has apparently determined that I'm gay. Yup, I get ads for lesbian match-making services all the time. At least I'm not getting ads for Doc Marten boots and flannel shirts...

Dear Facebook, I am not gay. Stop with the lesbian dating service ads already!

Nick Thune Changes Your Life

Say what you will about Jay Leno--I like him. Especially for introducing the exceptionally hysterical Nick Thune to the American public. Much more entertaining than the Rush Limbaugh interview that followed.

LashFood

Forget silicone implants, Botox or Restylane. The latest cosmetic enhancement treatment is lash lengthening. No doubt you've seen the gorgeous Brooke Shields hawking the benefits of Latisse. This lash treatment was actually developed when doctors and patients noticed one of the side effects of the glaucoma drug bimatoprost was longer, thicker lashes. They quickly reformulated the drug and marketed it as a way to increase lash length and volume.

Unfortunately, while long lashes is a welcome side effect of a glaucoma treatment, the side effects of Latisse include darkening of iris pigment and conjunctivitis for starters.

Brooke's luscious lashes notwithstanding, the side effects of Latisse are enough to give one pause. And let's face it: Shields' dramatic lashes are mostly a matter of genetics, lash tint and film magic. So, if you don't want to take the risk of bimatoprost side effects, can you still have gorgeous lashes?

Absolutely!

LashFood is all-natural lash stimulant/conditioner that contains biotin, an essential vitamin, arginine, a natural amino acid--and root and herbal extracts. Developed to condition, repair, restore, and create longer healthier and more beautiful eyelashes and eyebrows, LashFood contains no harsh chemicals to irritate your eyes--or, more importantly--change the pigment in your iris!

I've been testing out the product for the last couple of months and here are my results:

Darker lashes? Hmm--not really. My lashes still require mascara for maximum "Oomph!"

Thicker lashes? Yes, a bit. Not falsies plush, but a bit more volume.

Longer lashes? Most definitely! The conditioning benefits of LashFood allow my lashes to grow to their maximum length. Add a bit of mascara and the tips nearly touch the bottom of my eyebrows.

LashFood carries a price tag similar to Latisse--but without the nasty side effects. So for a natural solution to skimpy lashes, look into LashFood.

Heroes - Orientation/Jump, Push, Fall

Season four of Heroes started out promisingly enough. Peter Petrelli is trying to save the world by using his powers to be a paramedic superhero, Claire's enrolled at college, Nathan is not feeling quite himself--probably because he's actually Sylar, Sylar's consciousness is haunting Matt Parkman, Tracy apparently did not die when she shattered into a zillion pieces--apparently she's like that mercurial Terminator and can re-coalesce at will, Hiro and Ando have joined forces to set up a Dial a Hero business in Tokyo and Noah is at a loss for what he should be doing with his life.

In the two-part, two hour season premiere:

Danko died (I thought he died last season...)
Claire's annoying college roommate died (I got stuck for entire semesters with annoying roommates--how'd she get so lucky?)
Sylar goads Matt into using his powers
Nathan is discovering powers he didn't know he had (because he's actually Sylar...)
Noah is injured by Edgar and saved by Peter

New characters include a super-fast Samurai guy named Edgar (Peter steals his power to help in his paramedic superhero role...), Arnold who has the same ability as Hiro to move through time and space--but who is dying, Lydia who presages the future through the tattoos that appear on her body, a guy who reads those tattoos and I haven't quite figured out what his power might be other than making the earth move. Literally. I wonder if he does earthquakes?

If season four keeps up this quality, it should be pretty interesting. At least none of these new characters is another Maya or Alejandro. What do we think the compass does?

Teaching Evolution to Creationists

My favorite part of last night's episode of The Big Bang Theory:



Laurie Metcalf looked great, didn't she?

I'm so happy the The Big Bang Theory is back with new episodes. Like Penny I wanted to wrap my arms around the show and give it a big, fat kiss...

Observe and Report on Blu-ray/DVD September 22nd

Seth Rogen movies I have found to be very amusing:

The Forty-year old Virgin
Superbad
Knocked Up
Zack and Miri Make a Porno
Funny People

Seth Rogen movies I've found to be mildly amusing:

Pineapple Express

Seth Rogen movies that weren't funny at all:

Observe and Report

What's the difference between Seth Rogen as a slacker cop in Superbad vs. Seth Rogen as a hyper-vigilant mall cop in Observe and Report? My guess is that Seth Rogen is at his best in an ensemble cast rather than leading man. Even in Knocked Up, his role was balanced by a talented players such as Paul Rudd, Leslie Mann, Katherine Heigl, etc. In Observe and Report, the entire story centers around Rogen's delusional character--and unfortunately Rogen can't quite carry it off. (For a humorous take on Rogen the "actor," check out this satirical piece by my Facebook friend, Crystal Air Productions.)

It would hard for any actor to carry off the character of Ronnie Barnhart--a bipolar police wannabe with a drunken mother (Celia Weston), sycophantic co-worker (Michael Pena--slumming...) and obsession with slutty department store makeup artist (Anna Faris).

The film starts out promisingly with shots of "Forest Ridge Mall" really capturing the suburban mall culture. The opening seems to be reminiscent of Fast Times at Ridgemont High, but it quickly devolves into a disjointed series of scenes: Ronnie exercising his gung-ho authority, Ronnie patrolling the mall, flasher terrorizing females in the parking lot, a series of robberies in the mall, Ronnie pursuing the slutty Brandi, Ronnie trying to get into the police academy, blah blah blah.

I think I laughed once during the film.

Ronnie eventually captures the flasher (in the most gratuitous and shocking scene in the film), gets the girl (not the slutty Brandi, but sweet Nell played by Collette Wolfe, wife of writer/director Jody Hill, who ends up being the only sympathetic and likable character in the entire movie) and lives happily ever.

There's a lot of profanity, some violence and nudity--all of which separate this R-rated mall cop movie from the other mall cop movie. That OTHER mall cop movie made over $146 million domestically, however, while Observe and Report garnered only $24 million. The DVD, Blu-ray and digital download for Observe and Report available today contains no extras--no special features, outtakes, making of documentary. Just the feature.

Writer/director Jody Hill has earned kudos for his work as writer/director of Danny McBride vehicles Eastbound & Down and The Foot Fist Way. Maybe if McBride had played Ronnie Barnhart there would have been more than one laugh in Observe and Report.

The Green Hornet isn't supposed to be a comedy, is it?

Congrats Emmy Winners!

Didn't bother watching the show but I'm especially pleased that the following were recognized:

Toni Collette - Actress, Comedy

Kristin Chenoweth - Supporting Actress, Comedy

Michael Emerson - Supporting Actor, Drama

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (although I would have been even happier if Colbert had won...) - Comedy/Variety Show

Mad Men

I like it, but I'm not obsessed like many of my friends. Most likely because I missed season one and the whole "Don Draper" invention which laid the ground for the series. There is a sort of somnolent seductiveness to the show, I'll give you that. However, that smooth as a cold martini vibe was seriously disrupted with tonight's episode.

A severed foot? What the @#$%?!!! Reminiscent of the E.R. episode where Romano's arm was sliced off by a helicopter blade. That was brutal and shocking--but at least with E.R., blood spurting and grotesque injuries are de rigueur and therefore somewhat expected.

Sheesh!

The Informant!

Even though it clocks in at under two hours, The Informant! does have a tendency to drag a bit. Based on a true story, a title card at the beginning discloses that some characters are composites and dialogue dramatized.

So there.

The film about a pathological liar played with great gusto by Matt Damon is at its best when it explores the inane and utterly delusional inner dialogue of its subject.

My favorite part of the movie was one such tangential Whitacre voiceover:

"When polar bears hunt, they crouch down by a hole in the ice and wait for a seal to pop up. They keep one paw over their nose so that they blend in. Cuz’ they’ve got those black noses. They’d blend in perfectly if not for the nose...

So the question is. How do they know their noses are black? From looking at other polar bears? Do they see their reflections in the water? And think, “I’d be invisible if not for that.” That seems like a lot of thinking for a bear."

Damon is absolutely fantastic as Mark Whitacre, an ethically-challenged corporate whistle-blower. According to the synopsis at IMDB, Whitacre's participation in the FBI sting operation combined with having bipolar disorder led to a complete meltdown. Unfortunately, this unraveling was not examined with any depth in the film--although Whitacre's actions become increasingly erratic, it plays more like he's merely struggling to keep all the balls he's juggling in the air.

It would have also aided the story had Soderbergh and company let the truth unravel over the course of the film. It's pretty obvious early on that Whitacre isn't the "guy in the white hat" he purports to be. But kudos to Damon for creating a character so tragically comic, likeably loathsome and such a brilliant buffoon. The movie's not an Oscar contender, but Damon's performance most definitely is.