Saturday, September 20, 2008

Killing Time with the Keywords

Back by popular demand--whoohoo!


1. What does Ugly Betty look like?

This is what Ugly Betty looks like....

...and this is the lovely America Ferrara, the talented actress who plays Ugly Betty looks like!

2. In Ugly Betty, where did Amanda's biological dad find out about her and her performance?

Gene Simmons, lead singer of KISS, was allegedly believed to be Amanda's dad. We subsequently learned that he faked the Tweety Bird tattoo in order to score a reality series. But, acccording to the deceptive dad, he found out about Amanda and her performance because "I google myself every morning."

3. What is the budget for Heroes?

Approximately $3-4 million per episode.

4. How well did the new 90210 do?

According to Lisa de Moraes of the Washington Post, the premiere of the new 90210 did better than the premiere of Gossip Girl with an average of almost 5 million viewers. By week three, it has lost about 2 million of those viewers.

5. Why did Earl say there was no karma?

Earl had a crisis of faith where he was unable to see where two years of doing good deeds had gotten him.

6. What does Elina's tattoo from ANTM say?

According to Honestly ANTM, it says, "A voice for those who can't speak."


1. What is the song on Matthew McConaughey's cell in Tropic Thunder?

McConaughey who played Rick "Pecker" Peck had a ringtone of the Dan Hill song "Sometimes When We Touch" on his cellphone.

2. Fargo movie fact or fiction?

Fargo was NOT based on a true story, but is in fact the product of the warped minds of writer/directors Ethan and Joel Coen. According to IMDB, they may have been inspired by some actual Minnesotan crimes:

"The specific crimes shown in Fargo didn't happen, but the plot seems to employ elements of two well-known Minnesota crimes. In 1962 a St. Paul attorney named Eugene Thompson hired someone to kill his wife, Carol. Unbeknownst to Thompson, his man hired someone else to actually do the job. The second man fatally wounded Mrs. Thompson in her house but she managed to escape him. She went to a neighbor's house for help while her assailant fled the scene. The sloppiness and brutality of the crime attracted great attention. The murderers were quickly caught and gave up Thompson, who denied knowing anything about the crime for many years afterwards.

In 1972, Virginia Piper, the wife of a wealthy Orono banker, was kidnapped. A million-dollar ransom was paid, one of the largest in U.S. history. Mrs. Piper was then found tied to a tree in a state park. Two men were convicted of the crime, but were acquitted after a re-trial. However, one of them later went on a shooting spree when his wife left him, killing her, her son from a previous marriage, her new man and one of his boys, and his own five-year old son. Only $4,000 of the money was ever recovered."

3. A couple of people were interested in Pineapple Express wardrobe--specifically "belt buckle that looks like Dale Dentons" or "what company makes Seth Rogen's belt buckle?"

This is what Dale Denton's belt buckle looks like:

It's a pewter iron cross belt buckle.

...and the closest I could come in finding one that looks like it was this (on left):

$14.99 from BCheap. Knock yourselves out!

4. Classic films starring dog?

IMDB lists over 16,000 titles tagged with the keyword "dog." Here are just a few of the relevant ones:
  • Benji
  • Old Yeller
  • Beethoven
  • Turner and Hooch
  • The Wizard of Oz
  • Scooby Doo
  • Sounder
  • 101 Dalmatians
  • Lady and the Tramp
  • Cujo
  • Come Back, Little Sheba
  • Lassie Come Home
  • I Am Legend
  • Snow Dogs
  • The Ugly Dachshund
  • K-9
  • My Dog Skip
  • The Shaggy Dog
  • White Fang
  • Oh Heavenly Dog
  • Air Bud
  • and last, and certainly least, the upcoming Beverly Hills Chihuahua.
5. California wines that 2006 rematch mentioned in Bottle Shock?

According to Wikipedia the top three were:
  1. Ridge Vineyards Monte Bello 1971
  2. Stag's Leap Wine Cellars 1973
  3. Mayacamas Vineyards 1971 and Heitz Wine Cellars 'Martha's Vineyard' 1970 (tie)


1. The Road Cormac McCarthy symbolizes?

I'm not sure The Road "symbolizes" anything. It was a painstakingly realistic portrayal of life after a nuclear holocaust. And to the searcher looking for "The Road + happy ending," there really isn't one. Sorry.

2. Main character of Russell Banks The Sweet Hereafter?

There was no main character in the BOOK. The novel devotes a section to each of several characters: Dolores Driscoll, the busdriver; Billy Ansel, the Vietnam veteran who lost his twins; Mitchell Stephens, the lawyer; Nicole Burnett, a teenager paralyzed in the crash and finally Dolores Driscoll again.

The movie, however, puts much of the focus on the Mitchell Stephens character.

3. Similarities between John Irving's life and A Prayer for Owen Meany?

I believe it was Until I Find You which featured situations drawn from Irving's own life.


A lot of searches for tattoos: "cool Indiana tattoo" (sorry to break this to you--but that's probably an oxymoron...), "female crotch tattoos" (OUCH!), "gross tattoos" (see previous...), "pit bull tattoos," "laugh now, cry later tattoo" or the similarly popular "smile now, cry later tattoo," "world of warcraft tattoo" (as if you weren't already a big enough geek...) and my favorite, "let's get fucked up and die tattoo."


Note: I am NOT a doctor, I just play one on this blog...

1. Dry scaly patch above eye?

Do you wear glasses or sunglasses? Do they have metal frames? Could be contact dermatitis from a nickel allergy...

2. Odds of cervical dysplasia morphing into cancer?

According to the Women's Health Channel, 30-50% of cervical dysplasia can progress into cancer IF left untreated.

Yearly PAP smears = very important!

3. How to inject with Novolog Flexpen?

Ah, this I am an expert on!
  1. Take cap off pen.
  2. Remove seal from pen needle and insert open end onto pen. Twist until it's attached.
  3. Remove protective cap from needle and set aside.
  4. Remove purple plastic thingy and throw away.
  5. Dial up one unit of insulin and depress orange button to make sure there are no air pockets.
  6. If no insulin comes out of needle, dial up another unit and depress orange button.
  7. When insulin comes out of needle, dial up correct dosage on pen.
  8. Find a fatty area on your body (the stomach is easiest and least painful) and slowly allow pen needle to pierce skin.
  9. Make sure the needle is all the way in and depress orange button to inject insulin dosage.
  10. Keep holding the orange button DOWN and allow 10-30 seconds for insulin to disperse.
  11. SLOWLY pull needle out of skin while still HOLDING the orange button DOWN (this prevents any backdraft).
  12. Take protective needle cap and insert it over needle. Use cap to remove needle from pen by twisting.
  13. Dispose cap with needle appropriately.
  14. Recap pen.
Voila! The most important part is to do the "air shot" (most guides say to do two units, but as long as you see a bead of insulin when you depress the orange button, there's no air pockets) and to allow the needle to stay injected until the insulin completely disperses. That way you are assured of getting your full, correct dosage.

Also, holding the orange button down until the needle is completely withdrawn is important in case you accidentally hit a blood vessel. Although not foolproof, holding the button down can prevent blood from being drawn back into the pen--thus contaminating the insulin.

3. Witty clips for power point presentation and vitamin D in endocrinology?

Wow. Who knew that endocrinologists had a sense of humor?


1. The name Smart & Final means?

Amazingly enough, it's the combination of the names of two of the founders: and Jim SmartHildane Final. You learn something new every day!

2. "Derm" stands for?

"Skin." Derma is latin for skin and so dermatology would be the study of skin diseases and a dermatologist is a doctor who treats skin diseases.

3. Lyrics to the song with the words "lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song" in it?

The Beatles song "With a Little Help from My Friends" featured drummer Ringo Starr on lead vocals and goes like this:

What would you think if I sang out of tune
Would you stand up and walk out on me
Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song
And I'll try not o sing out of key

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends
Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends
Mm, gonna try with a little help from my friends

What do I do when my love is away
Does it worry you to be alone?
How do I feel by the end of the day
Are you sad because you're on your own

No, I get by with a little help from my friends
Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends
Mm, gonna try with a little help from my friends

Do you need anybody
I need somebody to love
Could it be anybody
I want somebody to love

Would you believe in a love at first sight
Yes, I'm certain that it happens all the time
What do you see when you turn out the light
I can't tell you but I know it's mine

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends
Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends
Mm, gonna try with a little help from my friends

Do you need anybody
I just need someone to love
Could it be anybody
I want somebody to love

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends
Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends
Mm, gonna try with a little help from my friends
Yes I get by with a little help from my friends
With a little help from my friends

4. Italian word for "main event"?

All the translators I used came up with "evento principale" which is most likely a literal translation. Any Italians out there who can give a more idiomatic translation?

5. What name goes well with the middle name Stella?

Personally, I don't think the name "Stella" should be hiding in the middle! But whatever you do, don't name the kid "Ella," "Bella" or "Della."

Odds and Ends

Still getting people searching for skin: "nude yoga," "nude runner," "Mark Cuban shirtless" and "Tom Bergeron shirtless" (Hi Elisabeth!).

For the person searching for "who was the monartch from 1520-30?"--could you be more specific? Monarch of France, English, Spain, Sweden? Narrow it down, Dude!

Then there was a search for "ugly ghost faces," "movie footwear ultimatum," "craigslist in frostproof Florida" and "cheaters never prosper for power writing."

And to the person searching for "Picture of Napoleon Dynamite wearing a Speedo"--Please get help. Soon.

Finally, we had "what's the difference between below average, average and above average beauty?"

It's all in the eyes of the beholder. See "Picture of Napoleon Dynamite wearing a Speedo" and "Tom Bergeron shirtless" for examples...

And last, "Average person can become above average or even higher?"

Most definitely! Just keep reading this blog...


  1. The Odds and Ends are the best. Giggling at Napoleon in a Speedo.

  2. Wow, you are so good to your readers. I'm in awe!

  3. Elisabeth,

    I know! That certainly beats out Mark Cuban shirtless, eh?


    You have NO idea how long it takes me to do these! But I do it 'cuz I love you guys!